If You Go Away
by Huntress of the stars
Summary: A songfic based on Patricia Kaas's song If You Go Away. Marguerite's thoughts on Percy's constant absence.


This songfic is based on the song "If You Go Away" by Patricia Kaas.

* * *

If You Go Away

There was a distant echo of memory that struck past Marguerite, twirled in some distant ballroom and laughed with an adoring suitor. There was a wave that flickered from view just as she turned to look at it, a fire that burned with the intensity of a love she knew.

A knock came at the door, but Marguerite did not budge from her place by the window. Quietly it opened, and she closed her eyes at the creeping steps behind her.

"Why must you go?" she asked, and two hands grasped her shoulders. Percy looked on, watching the sun set with the last rays of freedom. Tomorrow he would once more become the Scarlet Pimpernel.

"You know why. There are many yet to be rescued, my dear Margot."

"I understand. Why have you come?"

"To bid my wife good-bye."

She turned around and he smiled down at her.

"Adieu."

There was a light that reflected in his lazy blue eyes, and Marguerite loved it more than all the world. She could not imagine life without it, or his laugh, his kindness, his love. Why had she fallen for the very hero all the ladies adored? How had she managed to wed him? Why did he have to go?

_If you go away _

_On this summer day  
Then you might as well _

_Take the sun away  
__All the birds that flew _

_In the summer sky  
When our love was new _

_And our hearts were high  
When the day was young _

_And the night was long  
And the moon stood still _

_For the night birds song _

_If you go away _

_If you go away_

_If you go away…_

He turned to leave the room, but Marguerite held fast.

"One more day, Percy. Please."

"M'dear, I've stayed a week. There have been hundreds killed for my lack of action. I cannot allow more to die."

"When do you leave?"

"Now, if you can spare me."

She sighed, and pulled herself up to him. The man's hands wrapped about her and they were locked in an embrace for an eternity, until another knock came at the door.

"Must you go?" she breathed into his chest.

"I must," he replied, and detached himself from her arms. Percy blessed her with a kiss, and then he was gone.

_But if you stay _

_I'll make you a day  
Like no day has been _

_Or will be again  
Well sail the sun _

_Well ride on the rain  
Well talk to the trees _

_Well worship the wind  
And if you go _

_I'll understand  
Leave me just enough love _

_To hold in my hand _

_If you go away _

_If you go away _

_If you go away…_

She sat by the window again, watching his carriage ride off into the distance, not bothering to wipe the tears that streamed down her face. Every time he left, every time, she knew might be the last. What if they killed him? What if they caught him? Dismembered him and left him on English soil to rot away, and she would never feel his lips on hers again? She would never hear his voice nor laugh at his wit, nor would they ever hold the peace of each other's eyes.

Marguerite remembered the time when they had been estranged, locked away from one another by pride and hurt. When his blankness had filled her mind so entirely until her denial of love became adoration of such ferocity that she dared not deny its luminous existence.

_If you go away  
As I know you must _

_There'll be nothing left  
In the world to trust _

_Just an empty room  
Full of empty space _

_Like the empty look  
I see on your face _

_I've been the shadow  
Of your shadow_

_I felt you might have kept me _

_By your side _

_If you go away _

_If you go away…_

She should have given him all her love, every last drop. She should have poured adoration upon him in such strength that he could not budge from her grasp. She could have kept him. She should have. Yet Marguerite knew that such greed was beyond her power. How could she keep love and let innocents die? Pride was a thing to be honoured, and desire sacrificed.

They would have laughed and walked about the river, conversing. They would remain silent by the oaks, gazing at the beauty around them. They would have walked about their estate, the gardens, breathed in the sweet aromas of blooming flowers. They would have been at peace with all around them, if only for a fleeting eternity.  
But he would have been with her.

_But if you stay _

_I'll make you a day  
Like no day has been_

_Or will be again  
We'll sail the sun _

_We'll ride on the rain  
We'll talk to the trees _

_We'll worship the wind  
And if you go I'll understand,  
Leave me just enough love _

_To hold in my hand  
If you go away  
If you go away…_

Marguerite stood and wiped the tears from her eyes, and seated herself at her table. There were books upon the shelves, but there was no literature that would calm her weeping heart. She needed nothing but Percy. This was an event she should have become accustomed to, with all of his travels out and about. But every time he left her, she could not laugh until his return. She ever worried, ever thought of him. There were tears ready to tear apart her mask of happiness at the smallest news. Marguerite took a pen and dipped it into the ink holder. On the empty parchment, in a neat hand, she spilled the five words that her heart screamed.

_Et ne me quites pas..._


End file.
